Mad Ramble's In the Attic OR My Dabble in Metafiction

A bit of dust, a dash of mothballs, and a hint of memory lane. Something from the past. Please be forewarned: If you are trying to take any bit of knowledge of anything other than what a clown I was (ok who am I kidding...Still am....) step away. If you have no sense of humor, click your back button and go back to Twitter and find someone else to tweet. And if you are my dad, well...I apologize for anything I am about to incriminate myself with here in the next few lines.

Part I Teen Angst


This first bit has been edited for content, and I have to say, I crack up reading it as I have no idea who half the people I refer to are. Including the "hottest guy I've ever seen." Really. Absolutely no recollection. Eh. I was 15.

Dec 1 1997.
Life in the Fast Lane. Last year that was the story of my life. The more things change, the more they stay the same, obviously. Me and Boy Wonder¹ broke up a week ago. Effed² if I cared. I hate school. I like this guy, but I think he thinks I want to flat out go out with him, like the Junior High s***. I wanna date him. I wanna date a lot of people. One of them, Batman³ has a girlfriend and goes to Gotham City⁴ He wants to go out with me this weekend. The other is this HOTTIE (the hottest guy I've ever seen!!) and he has a girlfriend. When I say date, I mean like, go out, have fun, no worries. No one seems to want that. Superman (that's the guy's name, he's in my driver's ed class) is from Smallville⁵ and is cool as eff. Hi sgirlfriend is pretty but, eff, so am I. I no longer have such low self-esteem 26 year old Ramble's note: No, 15 year old Ramble, obviously that wasn't an issue. No longer do I crave the sympathy trips. Eff all I crave is excitement. And some new blood ok, 26 year old interjecting once more. For the record, I write a LOT about vampires now, I realize that, it's the craze....but for the record, I meant new blood figuratively. I'm not goth and never was. Nothing wrong with that, just wanted the reader to have a clear visual It's only December and I'm already sick of school hard core again.I'm effed too cause I haven't been doing s*** on my homework. Eff, why does Metropolis⁶ have to be so damn boring? I need guys from other schools that's all there is to it!!!
December 16 1997
What's the point of doing home work when you're damned to flunk the class because of stupid teachers. Eff it. Ten years from now, I'll be somewhere besides that crummy little school of Metropolis High. yes, somewhere far far away, like down the street 2 1/2 years left. Yuck. 5 days till Christmas break. Watched Con Air tonite. Great movie.

Footnotes 1 Obviously his name wasn't Boy Wonder, but you prolly already figured that one out. Right? 2 "Effed" wasn't popular when I was in high school. Apparently, the traditional version was. I used it quite a bit. Got that one, too, didn't ya? Apparently over-dramatization was my thing, too. "Life in the Fast Lane" really? I don't know who I was kidding. 3-6 Yeah. I'm a comic book geek. Wanna fight? I'll eff you up.


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